It is hard to imagine that I am a year away from graduating from college. Now this is not normally a big thing, but if you knew me, and the way I use to be, you would understand. I never thought that I would be one who 1) loves college and love to learn, and 2) actually graduate from a four year college. This is all due to the Lord's faithfulness and His mercy in my life. He is the one who has changed my heart and given me this desire to go to school and work hard at it and actually love every minute of it. I am learning so much and making some really good friends that I know I will have for life.
In all of this I am also learning how much sin is in me. This is not a fun thing to learn. I hate that in me there is a reservoir of sin and filth that still longs to show its ugly head. I have seen many struggles in my life this semester; many failings and falls into temptation. Sometimes it goes on without me even noticing, and when I do, I wonder if I can ever change and be like Christ. This is the most heartbreaking thing that I struggle with while I am in school. I get so "busy" that I forget Jesus. This I hate the most.
Lord change my heart and bring me back to you. Forgive me of my sin and hypocrocisy, and wash me of my sin and shame. Lord break my heart and renew my spirit so that I may be more able to serve you in all holiness and truth. Lord enable me to walk worthy of the calling with which you have called me into your Son.